I'm Becoming a Sweater Guy

January 11, 2009 · 14 comments

I've never really been one to wear sweaters. I'm not sure if that is because I am usually warm or because I have bad memories of itchy wool sweaters from when I was a kid, but no matter what the reason the number of sweaters hanging in my closet has been stuck at two for the past twenty years or so.

The last few weeks those sweaters have seen some use and I am beginning to see the light.

Here are the two benefits I am seeing from wearing sweaters, and why I am becoming a sweater guy:

Hiding Fat
OK, so sweaters don't really hide the fat. That stuff is hard to hide. But what I mean is when you have a dress shirt tucked into dress pants do you still feel sort of naked? I know I do. I think that's why they invented suit coats – gives the body a cleaner line. I'm not into wearing suits but I have found that I can derive some of the same benefits by layering a sweater over my shirt. Now I can have my shirt neatly tucked in but with the sweater over it I feel like I am hiding more of the fat.

Note that this only works with loose sweaters. I'll be staying away from a tight cashmere sweater for some time.

Hiding Suspenders
This is the number one reason I am liking my sweaters. Because before I realized that I was a sweater guy I found out that I was a suspenders guy. Suspenders (the nice silk ones that utilize buttons sewed into your dress pants, not the cheesy elastic ones with clips) have become an important part of my dress-up wardrobe. As you guys with big bellies know all to well one of the problems with that belly is that your belt likes to make its home underneath it no matter how hard you try to cinch it up. And when your belt falls down your pants fall down, or at least drag on the ground, which is no good.

Suspenders keep your dress pants at a consistent height, giving them a very nice look. The problem, though, is that unless you have a jacket hiding them you have these damned ugly suspenders out in the open. Sure they looked good on Michael Douglas in Wall Street but they really don't look good on a fat guy. Necessary, but don't look good.

That's were the sweater comes in. The sweater hides the suspenders so that I can still have my perfectly fitted and comfortable (I didn't mention comfortable – sure is comfortable not having a tight belt on!) dress pants, without the ugly suspenders.

Plus, I think they look nice.

So that's why I'm a sweater guy now. At least for the winter.

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{ 14 comments }

Emma January 11, 2009 at 12:14 am: Those sweaters with, uh, zip collars for want of a better description are pretty popular among the guys in my office at this time of year. They look nice. My husband does the cashmere armless thing and looks pretty spiffy. Long live the sweater!

I think you are thinking of a zippered fleece – I had a couple of those although the zippers have both broken. Need to get some new ones. They are more casual but indeed I used them in the same way.
myweightylossjourney January 11, 2009 at 12:34 am: Do you think a sweater would help me hide the fat when I'm swimming? I always feel really self-conscious walking from the change room to the pool and back…. Someone, somewhere will have an idea on this I'm sure..
Good luck with the sweater!

Um, no, I don't think that would help, lol!
Andrew is getting fit January 11, 2009 at 1:30 am: Heh…I wear sweaters now in winter as I'm cold! I never used to get cold when I had all my fat but my insulation is getting thin!

I haven't felt that feeling in awhile but I know about it – I guess that is the downside of getting into shape? Nah!
Israel January 11, 2009 at 11:31 am: Im a sweater guy, but not in the same sense as you John. I wear them to work out, helps me feel like am "sweating more" and it also helps when its 40 degress out and you are running at night.

You probably mean sweatshirts, right? Or at least fleeces? I don't think I've seen anyone exercise in a proper sweater. Despite the name.
Sadie January 11, 2009 at 1:25 pm: I love sweaters! I wear them all the time – so does my hubby. They're warm and fuzzy and so comfy!

I've been wearing a fleece around the house because we have been keeping the house cold this winter to save on gas bills. Normally I'm warm enough.
Greg Hayes January 11, 2009 at 2:21 pm: My wife has tried to make me into a sweater guy, but I alas, she has failed. Now fleece pullovers – that's the ticket! Buy them about one size too big, and you can hide a small dog inside them. Trust me, I've done it – but that's another story…

Yep, I like the fleece too. I have one pullover I wear a lot and I had 2 zippered fleeces but the zippers are broke and I need to replace them.
JC January 11, 2009 at 5:28 pm: I have a similar story. When I was younger, I was the fat kid. I used to wear t-shirts and pants that were about 2 sizes too big. When I look at old pictures, I looked really, really silly. Good memories!

You have a funny definition of "good"
South Beach Steve January 11, 2009 at 8:41 pm: I cannot do sweaters. I am so hot natured I would be sweating all the time. They have their place, just not on me.

You know I thought the same thing but it really hasn't been a problem for some reason. Of course it's been below zero so I suppose that helps.
lisa January 12, 2009 at 11:11 am: Love sweaters. When you are not quite "fitting" into those pants, and the button seems to tight, it also hides when you "ease" your waistline. Great fashion-flaw saver in tough times. Love your blog. Thanks for sharing!
Steve v4.7 January 12, 2009 at 11:25 am: Hmm… I think you're on to something there- I'd be all over a "fat-camo" line of sweaters. Then I could tell people that I'm not fat, I'm just fuzzy.
Tom Rooney January 12, 2009 at 11:27 am: I do the grey hooded (hoodie) sweatshirt when I'm not at work. Suit and tie while there. I like sweaters, but never really find the one that hangs on the body well.
jason January 12, 2009 at 1:31 pm: This post is funny. I am a suspenders guy when I go skiing. Also, my mom always wanted me to wear V-neck preppy sweaters when I was a kid so I know about those itchy memories. I wear sweaters now too. Before, at 307 lbs, I was always hot and sweaters were a no no. Now at 180 I like the added warmth. Great post and keep up the good work.
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Hilary aka Ms. Turtle January 12, 2009 at 1:45 pm: Hrm . . . I totally do the sweater thing. For the month or so of the year I can get away with it down here in Texas, anyways!
Levi January 14, 2009 at 2:53 pm: I've been wearing sweaters more often the past few years. I'd never wear them when I was a kid, but now I am liking them for whatever reason.