Has this ever happened to you?
You are fat. You know you need to lose weight. And you think about this a lot. Often times you think about it while in the car. On your way to a restaurant, perhaps. As you drive you start by thinking about how good you have been lately at this particular restaurant, let's call it Bruegger's, where for lunch you used to have 2 salt bagels with jalapeno cream cheese and cucumbers, a bowl of soup and a large chocolate chip cookie. Over the last month you have whittled your habit down to 1 salt bagel with jalapeno cream cheese and cucumbers, a cup of soup and a single small chocolate caramel. You are this close to getting rid of the chocolate caramel as well.
As you think about this food you realize you are hungry. You had a healthy breakfast of a banana and a Kind Fruit & Nut Bar. But now you are hungry. You don't like being hungry. You are about 5 minutes still from stopping when you start to rationalize why it would be OK to have that extra bagel sandwich (all 400 calories of it). You had a light breakfast, you tell yourself. You deserve that extra sandwich, you tell yourself. You tell yourself how good you have been lately, even though it isn't totally true.
Then you shake yourself out of it and think about maybe just having a bowl of soup instead of a cup. At some point during this thinking about having been good so far, being hungry, and being close to eating you end up giving in and going back to the old standby – 2 bagel sandwiches, a bowl of soup and what the hell you already screwed up so might as well have the cookie too.
It's happened to me far too many times.
Friends, I am happy to report that while I had those feelings yesterday I was able to squash them by the time I got out of my car, where I resolved I would have my new normal meal and no more. What I remembered as I was going through these mental gymnastics was what I had written here before about finding that even though I had significantly decreased the amount I was eating at lunch that I found myself still satisfied after the meal. I remembered what I wrote. I knew I was hungry but I also knew that I wasn't going to be after I ate, whether I had 2 bagel sandwiches or 1.
Unless you are fighting this fight you have no idea how good it feels to know you conquered a small section of the mental mountain that is the journey from fat to fit.
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