Conquering a Small Section of the Mental Mountain

August 28, 2007 · 6 comments

Has this ever happened to you?

You are fat.  You know you need to lose weight.  And you think about this a lot.  Often times you think about it while in the car.  On your way to a restaurant, perhaps.  As you drive you start by thinking about how good you have been lately at this particular restaurant, let’s call it Bruegger’s, where for lunch you used to have 2 salt bagels with jalapeno cream cheese and cucumbers, a bowl of soup and a large chocolate chip cookie.  Over the last month you have whittled your habit down to 1 salt bagel with jalapeno cream cheese and cucumbers, a cup of soup and a single small chocolate caramel.  You are this close to getting rid of the chocolate caramel as well.

As you think about this food you realize you are hungry.  You had a healthy breakfast of a banana and a Kind Fruit & Nut Bar.  But now you are hungry.  You don’t like being hungry.  You are about 5 minutes still from stopping when you start to rationalize why it would be OK to have that extra bagel sandwich (all 400 calories of it).  You had a light breakfast, you tell yourself.  You deserve that extra sandwich, you tell yourself.  You tell yourself how good you have been lately, even though it isn’t totally true.

Then you shake yourself out of it and think about maybe just having a bowl of soup instead of a cup.  At some point during this thinking about having been good so far, being hungry, and being close to eating you end up giving in and going back to the old standby - 2 bagel sandwiches, a bowl of soup and what the hell you already screwed up so might as well have the cookie too.

It’s happened to me far too many times.

Friends, I am happy to report that while I had those feelings yesterday I was able to squash them by the time I got out of my car, where I resolved I would have my new normal meal and no more.  What I remembered as I was going through these mental gymnastics was what I had written here before about finding that even though I had significantly decreased the amount I was eating at lunch that I found myself still satisfied after the meal.  I remembered what I wrote.  I knew I was hungry but I also knew that I wasn’t going to be after I ate, whether I had 2 bagel sandwiches or 1.

Unless you are fighting this fight you have no idea how good it feels to know you conquered a small section of the mental mountain that is the journey from fat to fit.

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Spunk August 30, 2007 at 7:25 pm

I dealt with this just yesterday! Boy did I ever feel like a conquering queen when I strolled out of the mall with no chocolate, no other crappy foods, but a good for me smoothie. :)

john August 31, 2007 at 9:07 pm

That a way Spunk! I think it is really important to recognize and celebrate these accomplishments, because you know damn well you are going to remember and be depressed about the opposite issue. Keep remembering how good you felt when you conquered it, I think it will help later. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

john September 8, 2007 at 11:45 am

I’m now just eating a bagel sandwich and a cup of soup, no more caramel for dessert. A piece of sugar free gum is doing the trick. This now feels like a “normal” persons lunch. It might still be too much for me, I’ll have to play that by ear. But it feels good to get here.

Sara January 29, 2008 at 8:17 pm

I’ve been there before. This post rings really true to me.

By the way, I am stopping by from the Soup to Nuts Progressive Dinner.

Stop by the first course and visit me.

Lahrah August 29, 2008 at 7:51 am

Thanks for the posts. I really enjoy reading about your struggle and look forward to your continued success. I feel like I’ve been spinning my wheels lately — quite literally (in my spinning class) and the number on the scale is just not budging. I have to constantly remind myself that slow and steady wins the race, especially in weight loss…. and that what I eat matters!

Thanks for the thoughts.

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